It’s like Romeo and Juliet all over again, except that your families aren’t fighting, nobody is dying and you can actually see each other… Ok, it’s not like Romeo and Juliet, but your parents really don’t like your boyfriend. When people we love don’t like each other it can make us nervous, anxious and overall it just adds stress to our lives, so we need to fix it.
We all like to think our boyfriends are perfect and can do no wrong, which makes us freak out when our parents show their disapproval of this cool guy. We are in love and the parental unit can’t stand to see us happy! Not really. In fact, that attitude will get us nowhere, so if you are having problems with your mom and dad and your boyfriend, here is your guide!
1. Be civil
Breaking down crying or going into a screaming match with your parent about your boo will not help his case in the slightest. Remain calm when approaching the topic and be cool! Mom and dad have your best interests at heart; there is no need to go on a rampage.
2. Calmly ask why
Try to sit down with one or both of your parents and go straight for it. Ask them what it is that bugs them so much about your boyfriend and don’t get up on their faces when they answer. Think of it as a business meeting, this is your gateway to fixing the problem so you must remain calm and collected and prove you’re mature enough to have this conversation, let alone date.
3. Show them
If what they answer in the step above is something you are absolutely positive is not true, make sure to prove them the opposite. If they think he’s a bad influence, let them know about the time he spends helping at the dog shelter. If they think he is bad for your grades, keep those A’s coming! Of course, make sure that they are actually wrong and that your judgment isn’t obscured by love’s pink tinted glasses. More on this on point number 5.
4. Talk to your guy
If he asks you straight up if your parents hate him, try to be nice about the way you answer. They may dislike him, but he doesn’t need to know that they’d rather send you to a convent before you keep dating him. Tell him some aspects they may not approve of and explain that maybe he should try to change the image they have of him. Don’t make your parents the enemy, though, because that will only add more emotions to the equation and it won’t do any good. Little pointers like not putting his feet on the table of being more polite, perhaps even helping your parents with dinner may be of help.
5. Take off the glasses
Like I mentioned at the start of this article, sometimes we think that our beau can do no wrong and that our parents are crazy for not seeing every inch of perfection in him. However, love is a powerful thing and it can make us lose perspective. Take a cold, objective look at your boyfriend and the points your mom or dad brought up and be very analytic about it. It could actually be true and you could be blinded by love. Is he respectful to you? Does he make you sad a lot? Maybe your parents are seeing something that you have refused to acknowledge.
Hopefully you will be able to smooth out the situation between the parental unit and your boo. Be sure to keep a clear head and listen, after all parents sometimes do know best. If in doubt, go to your best friends and ask them about it. If you notice that they actually agree with your parents on some stuff, maybe it’s time to make some changes!
Image Credit: Chained Heart